June 3, 2006
 
COMMENTARY: Presidential Head Hunting
 
By Joseph J. Honick
President, GMA International Ltd.
 
Bainbridge Island, WA (HNN) -- I have this friend Chuck. He’s called a “head hunter.” He’s not a cannibal, though that’s sometimes debatable. Chuck is a professional executive searcher. When companies and other organizations look for key executives, Chuck and his staff scour the nation looking for just the right candidates to recommend to a selection committee.
 
So what, you say? Here’s what:
 
A large segment of the American electorate agrees that the current cast of pretenders to the White House Oval Office leaves an awful lot to be desired. In fact, according to my completely non-scientific poll, many believe that none of the two (or three) candidates would pass muster for Chuck’s executive search screening.
 
So?
 
Why not set up an executive search to find a good set of qualified candidates for the national selection committee, for you and me to pick from in November?
 
Consider the savings. Instead of an overload of advertising in the broadcast, print and internet media and the hundreds of millions it will cost, we could hire a good search firm or a consortium of them to handle the job. And, by the way, search firms are paid on the basis of a percentage of the first year’s salary of the selected candidate, plus out of pocket expenses.
 
They could use traditional methods. In addition to placing carefully worded advertisements in the Wall Street Journal, Rolling Stone and maybe even the Financial Times, they would make some discreet telephone calls to already well-employed people and try to steal them from their present positions.
 
The ad might go something like this:
 
WANTED: PRESIDENT
 
LARGE NATIONAL ORGANIZATION WITH WORLDIDE SUBSIDIARIES REQUIRES CHIEF EXECUTIVE TO DIRECT POLICY M AKING AND DAY TO DAY OPERATIONS.
 
RESPONSIBILITIES INCLUDE DIRECTION OF MILITARY, FOREIGN AFFAIRS AND DOMESTIC ACTIVITIES AND HOSTING OF HIGH LEVEL DINNERS. THE RIGHT CANDIDATE WILL HAVE NO ALLERGIES AS MUCH TIME IS SPENT IN A ROSE GARDEN MAKING SPEECHES. BENEFITS INCLUDE A SIX-FIGURE SALARY PLUS A MODEST EXPENSE ACCOUNT, COMPLETE MEDICAL COVERAGE AND AND A GENEROUS PENSION, PALATIAL HOME AND COUNTRY RESIDENCE.
 
PERSONAL FLEET OF AIRCRAFT AND AUTOS SUPPLIED.
 
NO EXPERIENCE REQUIRED; WILL TRAIN ON THE JOB
 
REPLY IN CONFIDENCE TO BOX 1600
 
Now what’s wrong with that?